It seems like yesterday that I was writing my goodbye-blog last year with the familiar feeling of nostalgia, happiness and most importantly great awe that I survived another year...lo and behold, here I am...writing it again ! Time perhaps has a firebolt, it flies by fast !
Thanks to calenders, fresh starts happen every year. New year is a chance to put the past behind you, prune away old habits and most importantly to reinforce the belief that every day comes with an opportunity to start afresh.
2013 was about losses and insanely painful wounds, but as they say the wound is the place where the light enters you, 2014 meant tending to those wounds and regaining composure...and work, 2014 meant loads of work too.
My focus remained on cutting the crap out...My FB remained deactivated this year too which meant no bullshit but it also meant that I got even lesser birthday calls than the last year...I became more silent and centered and kept to myself ...in the company of people I love the most - fictional characters of novels...
Books say XYZ did this because...
Life says XYZ did this...no reason, no explanations.
No wonder some people prefer books. I am one of those people.
The consequences being that everybody remained pissed at me for not attending their birthday parties, missing all the meetups, not going to social gatherings.It was primarily because I don't like being around people for long but this year I also had a lot of work which kept me occupied. But people don't understand and I hate to give explanations or answer questions so I let them get pissed at me which they anyway would! :P
The Inception
The beginning itself was marked by a soul-soothing journey to Vaishno Devi and I could tell that some higher power is there for me, guiding me as I walk along in my journey of life...It helped me accept my own pain that I was trying to numb for quite some time and acceptance brought about the determination and the will to do what I have always been known for - keep fighting till I win.
(I wrote a blog about the same already - http://surbhimakkar.blogspot.in/2014/02/ek-pal-niche-nazar-hai-ek-pal-upar_4.html?m=1)
Birthday Breakthrough
This year I had this sudden and strange urge on my birthday to break out of all my inhibitions and boundaries and try everything once while I am still on this earth...I mean, life is really short and we make it shorter by keeping ourselves fenced in our comfort zones...
So, bit by bit, I purged away the portions of my past that kept causing me immense pain for so many years...and only after letting go of it all, did I realise the weight of the baggage that I was carrying...
My resolution to try everything once, had another dimension too :P After a gap of 15 years, I resumed non- veg...it isn't as yummy as I had found it to be as a kid but at least I no more puke at the sight and smell of it :P Fish remains to be ticked off in the list.
And, er, I also tried, umm, a few things I would rather not mention here :D :P
But the best and my personal favourite item that I ticked off in this list is the one that follows next. :)
Do boond zindagi ki
The achievement I can really be proud of :)
I donated blood.
On Mother's day. :)
Why I did it?
The Mind : Every 2 seconds, someone needs blood. Each adult roughly has about 10-12 pints of blood and 1 pint is given during a donation...the blood that we donate can save lives of upto 3 people :)
Why I did it ? (1)
The Heart : It was my birthday on the 28th of April....and I wanted to celebrate it differently this year...having seen one of the lowest phases of my life in 2013, I had forgotten to laugh and smile...and then I came across this as I was randomly going through some old mails - you take care of others' smile and I shall take care of your smile...It is strange, I know, but it felt like some divine message to me...and I decided to look beyond my narrow perspective that centered around my life, my worries, my problems and try to ease the pain of others in any manner possible...
[now, I googled up a lot but there wasn't any camp happening on my birthday and there wasn't any hospital in the vicinity...having read the most boring book ever - the secret, I tried the Law of Attraction and, um, sent a request to the Universe that I wanted to do it no matter how...believe me, I got a mail the next day that The Lion's Club was going to organise a blood donation camp just a km away from my place on the 11th of May...not on my birthday exactly but nevertheless, I was amazed at how quickly my request got answered...God perhaps has a pretty good customer care service up there! ]
Why I did it ? (2)
The Soul : It happened to be Mother's Day that day and I sincerely hope that the blood I donated helped to save somebody's mother. :)
It was my first time but I would continue doing it every year, it was a divine feeling.
And on a lighter note, it is a good thing to give your 100% to every endeavour you undertake but don't do that while donating blood, just a pint would suffice :P
Work Unlimited
I immersed myself into work this year.
I quote, again, one of my favourite booklines :
The laziness bug
I was bitten by this fatal bug as a kid and the venom continues to flow in my blood to this day.
A Happy New Year to all of you :)
Thanks to calenders, fresh starts happen every year. New year is a chance to put the past behind you, prune away old habits and most importantly to reinforce the belief that every day comes with an opportunity to start afresh.
2013 was about losses and insanely painful wounds, but as they say the wound is the place where the light enters you, 2014 meant tending to those wounds and regaining composure...and work, 2014 meant loads of work too.
My focus remained on cutting the crap out...My FB remained deactivated this year too which meant no bullshit but it also meant that I got even lesser birthday calls than the last year...I became more silent and centered and kept to myself ...in the company of people I love the most - fictional characters of novels...
Books say XYZ did this because...
Life says XYZ did this...no reason, no explanations.
No wonder some people prefer books. I am one of those people.
The consequences being that everybody remained pissed at me for not attending their birthday parties, missing all the meetups, not going to social gatherings.It was primarily because I don't like being around people for long but this year I also had a lot of work which kept me occupied. But people don't understand and I hate to give explanations or answer questions so I let them get pissed at me which they anyway would! :P
This year was also about changes...habits that didn't give me any benefit but like parasites, were sucking the life out of me, had to go...and the most important change that I incorporated in myself with respect to this was what I learnt from my brother - He is a doctor. Once when he was home, in course of our banter he said these pearls of wisdom while I was asking him how he managed to give little kids injections daily...he simply said - unke dard se dosti kar lunga toh dur kaise karunga unka dard (if I keep thinking how much pain it will cause them, how would I treat their pain?)
And so I learnt that it is good to help people in pain but it won't do to lose your own peace of mind while helping them. Be a lamp, a lifeboat or a ladder; help someone's soul heal but do not become a mental patient yourself in the process !
The Inception
The beginning itself was marked by a soul-soothing journey to Vaishno Devi and I could tell that some higher power is there for me, guiding me as I walk along in my journey of life...It helped me accept my own pain that I was trying to numb for quite some time and acceptance brought about the determination and the will to do what I have always been known for - keep fighting till I win.
(I wrote a blog about the same already - http://surbhimakkar.blogspot.in/2014/02/ek-pal-niche-nazar-hai-ek-pal-upar_4.html?m=1)
Birthday Breakthrough
This year I had this sudden and strange urge on my birthday to break out of all my inhibitions and boundaries and try everything once while I am still on this earth...I mean, life is really short and we make it shorter by keeping ourselves fenced in our comfort zones...
So, bit by bit, I purged away the portions of my past that kept causing me immense pain for so many years...and only after letting go of it all, did I realise the weight of the baggage that I was carrying...
My resolution to try everything once, had another dimension too :P After a gap of 15 years, I resumed non- veg...it isn't as yummy as I had found it to be as a kid but at least I no more puke at the sight and smell of it :P Fish remains to be ticked off in the list.
And, er, I also tried, umm, a few things I would rather not mention here :D :P
But the best and my personal favourite item that I ticked off in this list is the one that follows next. :)
Do boond zindagi ki
The achievement I can really be proud of :)
I donated blood.
On Mother's day. :)
Why I did it?
The Mind : Every 2 seconds, someone needs blood. Each adult roughly has about 10-12 pints of blood and 1 pint is given during a donation...the blood that we donate can save lives of upto 3 people :)
Why I did it ? (1)
The Heart : It was my birthday on the 28th of April....and I wanted to celebrate it differently this year...having seen one of the lowest phases of my life in 2013, I had forgotten to laugh and smile...and then I came across this as I was randomly going through some old mails - you take care of others' smile and I shall take care of your smile...It is strange, I know, but it felt like some divine message to me...and I decided to look beyond my narrow perspective that centered around my life, my worries, my problems and try to ease the pain of others in any manner possible...
[now, I googled up a lot but there wasn't any camp happening on my birthday and there wasn't any hospital in the vicinity...having read the most boring book ever - the secret, I tried the Law of Attraction and, um, sent a request to the Universe that I wanted to do it no matter how...believe me, I got a mail the next day that The Lion's Club was going to organise a blood donation camp just a km away from my place on the 11th of May...not on my birthday exactly but nevertheless, I was amazed at how quickly my request got answered...God perhaps has a pretty good customer care service up there! ]
Why I did it ? (2)
The Soul : It happened to be Mother's Day that day and I sincerely hope that the blood I donated helped to save somebody's mother. :)
It was my first time but I would continue doing it every year, it was a divine feeling.
And on a lighter note, it is a good thing to give your 100% to every endeavour you undertake but don't do that while donating blood, just a pint would suffice :P
Work Unlimited
I immersed myself into work this year.
I quote, again, one of my favourite booklines :
There is nothing of any importance in life - except how well you do your work. Nothing. Only that. Whatever else you are, will come from that.It is the only measure of human value.
(#Atlas Shrugged)
The laziness bug
I was bitten by this fatal bug as a kid and the venom continues to flow in my blood to this day.
But the matters seemed to go out of hands as my weight shot up suddenly! The oily food I used to get at the client's place while on audits exacerbated it. Thankfully, I controlled it in time (stop laughing!) by including an exercise regime in my routine and am working towards getting back in shape. :D This is going to be carried forward to 2015 as well :D
5 People You Meet in Heaven
They say time erodes gratitude more quickly than it does beauty.
2014 gave me some very special people and I am so grateful to them for sharing their lives with me. I wish to express my sincere gratitude to them for their wonderful presence.
I am thankful to all the people who came to my life and helped me be a better person. This specifically includes my office people and my family, of course.
But there are a few extra kaminey friends to whom I wish to explicitly convey my gratitude...
(in no particular order)
AS - My soul sister. Need I say more? :) <3 [But yeah, I would like to make a request - keep your phone switched on !!! ]
KS - We get along like house on fire :P They say that to understand a dirty joke, you need both the speaker and the listener to have a dirty mind and I have never found such a complementary mind ;) :D I'd have used the word serendipity but now that the exam-year has begun I am using a slightly, umm, technical connotation to convey my feelings - ICAI along with Rohini ITT center applied the doctrine of harmonious construction to make me meet you :D
And of course this had to come - हमे तुमसे मिलाने का शुक्रिया..हमे हम से मिलाने का शुक्रिया :) <3
KK - Some people always say the right things. And some people never say it but always do the right things. One of the few people who belong in the latter category, you have always been a saviour. :) Your birthday gift remains pending but it would reach you at the right time (read when I stop being a lazy jerk :P) and aur zyada tarif nahi kar rahi ab main, hawa mei ho jana hai nahi toh tune :P :P
AA - I know we don't get to talk much now ever since my coaching began but I have had some really memorable conversations with you which made this year a little more fun, a little more joyful. And I am deliberately skipping a significant part here, hope you would understand it :D :P and if you don't, insert my favourite swear word first and then message me to know what I am talking about :P
NM - Thanks nocy. I need not mention that it feels great to be back on talking terms but I would like to draw your attention to the resilience of the bond again. :) Also, I didn't say it then (#50minutes worth of revenue for your company :D) but I missed pulling your leg wrt everything while we were not talking. :D
What 2014 taught me -
As we flip our calenders, we should keep flipping our minds as well...and see to it that we don't fill our future dates with past events. I learnt to forgive and to commit myself to dropping the past and everything that caused me pain so that I can start afresh and welcome 2015 with renewed faith.
Time changes people but there are people who change time and in 2015 I am going to strive towards being in the latter category.
A Happy New Year to all of you :)
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